Leaving is not for everyone. You must have a big heart, big enough to thank for everything you are leaving behind. Joys and sorrows, friends and lovers.
This heavy baggage beats even when you step somewhere that does not belong to you, laying down on a mattress that does not have your shape, sleeping in an uncomfortable pillow, looking at the ceiling wondering… What I’m i doing here? Where I’m I going?
You make friends in other language, you taste different flavours, you dance new rhythms, you make love in a different colour, everything feels strange, you are wearing a dress that doesn’t suit you, rushing in a city where no one knows you, you embrace a culture that you can’t understand.
You must have an open heart, willing to experience new things, new feelings, new challenges, new people. A heart that sometimes fears that your beloved ones you have left, have forgotten you, because their present have taken control of their lives and you are no longer part of it.
Leaving is being confused, waking up one day without knowing who you are, because you are being transformed into a new self, letting go the old mold that had already taken your shape, you are turning into a new version of yourself.
One day you wake up on the mattress that has now suffered a little from your weight, and the pillow feels softer, and the fearness now is glory, your darkness has lighten a little bit more, and you finally feel that you belong wherever you move.
Because when you go, rather than moving to another place, you are searching after the most important destination, your own.
Angola G
